Thursday, February 23, 2012

Blogging Survivor: One World - "It's definitely the boobs"

After finishing the season's initial Tribal Council complete disarray, the girls decided to call a tribe meeting to re-organize. Apparently deciding that they needed someone to make more passive aggressive comments, they decided to appoint Sabrina as their de facto leader. 

Survivor's first Do It Yourself Challenge consisted of the two tribes competing to un-tie a long strand of knots in a rope in order to release a key, with the winners getting a tarp to protect themselves from the rain. The girls were unable to capitalize in their first opportunity to redeem themselves, and victory went to the boys.

Colton continued to identify with the women more than he did with the men. "I have nothing in common with the guys. We all have an extra appendage, that's the only thing." However, his presence at the girl tribe was not all that well received either. As the season began I was on the fence as to whether Colton was going to end up being the funny and snarky gay guy, or just really annoying...I'm now 10% sure that it's the latter.

Sabrina commented, "Colton is like a virus...What a drama queen...Just go back to your camp." After the girls asked him to leave, Sabrina commented on his antics, "Dramatic...Now he's crying."

Feeling that he had no other options, Colton decided to tell Troy, Jonas, Tarzan and Leif that he had the hidden immunity Idol. However, while they agreed to play along with him to take out some of the younger muscle, things immediately went to his head. "Until I can get with the girls I  have to associate myself with these misfits...I'll just be their king."

Hey Tarzan, is that an enlarged prostate, or are you just happy to see me?

The Immunity Challenge consisted of the two tribes lining up and having to cross their teammates one by one on a balance beam without falling off. The men once again easily defeated the women, in part because Kat kept intentionally jumping in the water even as her tribe implored her not to...Not because she was trying to throw the challenge, but because she apparently just likes getting wet.

Having been arrested for theft, Kat's apparently part criminal, and part golden retriever.

Chelsea claimed that the women were at a disadvantage in the challenge from the start. "It's definitely the boobs," in reference to the difficulties they had getting around one another given the massive amounts of silicon that was bouncing around. However, the guys could have said the same thing about having to bump uglies with Colton, who for once was the guy's MVP.

Monica described the Immunity Challenge by saying, "Kat jumped in (the water) when she didn't need to jump in. Not once, twice. I'm sad. I'm sad for women. This isn't the way women are, and frankly, I'm so embarrassed." Of course, that's the same Monica who volunteered to strip for the men if they'd give the women some of their fire, so she's not exactly Gloria Steinem.

Knowing that she was probably the prime target to be voted out for social reasons, Nina targeted Kat's lack of physical contributions to the tribe in order to try to save herself. The cameras then flashed to a shot of Kat farting and laughing, which gave us the first good reason why it was a bad idea to divide the tribe along gender lines. Much like girls these days who think they are entitled to wear bikinis no matter how fat they are, the Salani Tribe seems to be just a little too comfortable for their own good.

In spite of the tribe acknowledging that Kat had cost her tribe the Immunity Challenge, she still prevailed over Nina at Tribal Council. And just like that, the one woman on the Salani Tribe who truly hated men was voted out in a season predictated upon a battle of the sexes. Things aren't looking good for the women.


  1. "Much like girls these days who think they are entitled to wear bikinis no matter how fat they are"

    They are entitled to wear bikinis. Guys go shirtless even if they are fat. Girls can wear whatever they want, skinny or not. Men do it, and I don't hear complaints..

  2. I don't think I exactly gave a ringing endorsement for Tarzan walking around in nothing but a pair of banana peel man briefs. If there's no shame in your game, don't hold a grudge when we judge ;)