Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Blogging Survivor: One World - "Christina's I.Q. is probably a zero. I don't know if that even exists, I mean, I'm a special ed teacher"

Realizing that the remaining two guys had little chance of defeating the remaining five women, Tarzan began to re-evaluate his strategy, and by re-evaluate, I mean he continued to play the game as he had been all along.

"If I was trying to play the odds in my favor, the smartest things to do is to go with what the girls want me to do rather than risk being exposed as a person on Troy-zan's side. "

Of course, the better odds to actually win the game and not just prolong an inevitable elimation would be to go along on a power move to flip the bottom two members of the girls alliance and change the game, but apparently that's no longer allowed in Survivor.

The Reward Challenge consisted of attempting to answer questions as the majority of the remaining Tikiano tribemates said as a whole. That gave the competitors insight as to how they were perceived by the group collectively, thereby allowing them to reflect, and perhaps change up their game.

For example, Christina learned that she was deemed least deserving of remaining in the game by her own alliance, which caused her alter her game strategy the rest of the episode by sucking up to the remaining women even more...Okay, bad example.

Correct answers allowed the competitors to cast a chop to a doll symbolizing one of their competitors, with three chops sending the doll into a fire and eliminating that player from the challenge.

When Troy was the first to go, Tarzan pontificated, "And he's become the molecular substrate of this island, so he does deserve to be here," causing Jeff Probst to comment sarcastically, "I was just about to say that."

Kat was unanimously voted (not counting her own vote) as the player most in need of a wake-up call in life, which was just a nice way of calling her stupid. Of course, Kat didn't quite seem to get the significance of the question.

At least she looks good in a bikini.

Kim ended up winning reward, which consisted of a ride in the helicopter from the Bachelor and a one-on-one picnic date on a mountain top, I mean a beach, and while there was no date, Kim did get to bring two people with her. Of course, that caused Kat to lose her shit when she selected Chelsea and Alicia over her.

Troy saw Kat's reaction as an opportunity to push some buttons, and he made a point to wonder aloud whether or not Kim's decision was a reflection of the pecking order in the womens' alliance.

Troy continued to work that angle while Kim, Alicia and Chelsea went on their reward, proposing that Kat, Christina and Sabrina join up with him. However, Sabrina remained loyal, and tricked Christina into revealing to her that she was considering going alonng with Troy.

Kat ultimately became so upset that she might be at the bottom of her alliance that she began crying, but then she talked to Kim and literally started digging a hole with her hindlegs, so I think she was happy again.

As the Tikiano tribe was sitting around camp, a "wild' pig happened to wander up, causing everyone to try and capture it. However, it was pretty clear nobody wanted to actually kill it with the makeshift clubs they grabbed, causing redneck Chelsea to say, "y'all are just giant yankee pussies."

Okay, Chelsea didn't really say that, but I'm sure she was thinking it.  

The Immunity Challenge consisted of a series of one-on-one challenges to race across a slip-n'-slide and toss rings on a pole. Tarzan elimated Troy-zan, which allowed the women to remain in control of the game when Kim won Immunity.

Worried that Troy might have an Immunity Idol, the girls lead by Kim decided to split their vote. Of course, when  Sabrina told Christina that they'd be sending a couple votes her way she didn't even question it, even though it would have likely meant she was going to go home if Troy did end up playing an Idol.

Alicia, being the top notch special education teacher she is, commented, "Christina's I.Q. is probably a zero, I don't know if that even exists. I mean, I'm a special ed teacher, so I handle Christina as one of my students."

What Alicia meant to say is that she used to be a special education teacher, as she's not likely to have a job after those comments.

And BTW, I find it hilarious that Alicia would criticize someone's I.Q., not even knowing what the proper scale is, especially when knowing that information would seem to be such an essential element of her job.

Alicia Rosa's I.Q. is fat and stupid.

At Tribal Council, Chelsea pretty much told Christina that the top three in the women's alliance had been determined on day 1, although Christina discounted that statement by stating how things could change.

When Jeff asked her why she's here, Christina's response was, "Because I'm one lucky girl." On the other hand, Kat stated how she did not want to go down in the game known as just a follower.

However, when the vote came in, Troy could not convince the women in the bottom of the girls' alliance to go along with his plan, and he was voted out.

True to his over-inflated sense of his own worth, Troy left the game by saying, "Fans out there I know are going to love my game, and hopefully they're going to appreciate it." Yes, because America does appreciate stupid...Just ask Alicia.

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