Monday, January 23, 2012

The Bachelor Blog: "I got a fish, and then her head almost popped off"

You knew the estrogen levels were starting to get high The Bachelor mansion this week when Ben announced that he was asking Rachel on a 1-on-1 date, and two different girls lost their shit started crying. Or as Kacie B. managed to sniffle, "I...wanted to throw up."

Rachel's date consisted of a canoe ride, followed by a general lack of conversation. However, Rachel isn't ugly, and she isn't crazy (so far as we know so far), so Ben gave her a rose anyway. Given some of the other girls left in the house, I can't say that he made the wrong decision.

Seriously, some girls get dates with private concerts, others get to do adventurous things like climb the Golden Gate Bridge. Rachel got to go on a canoe Utah.

This week's group date began with a horseback ride, followed by Ben trying to teach the girls how to fly-fish. Courtney explained, "Let's be honest, it's not really about catching a trout, it's about catching Ben...I've never fished before, but catching a fish probably isn't much harder than catching a man - done that before."

Having dated actor Jesse Metcalf of Desperate Housewives, Courtney Robertson definitely seems have a plan to "catch men"...even if she always does have a look on her face like someone took a shit on her stilettos.

Things didn't initially go as Courtney had planned, as Kacie B. was the first girl that Ben paid attention to. This caused Courtney to comment, "I think Kacie B's cute and sweet, and she's kind of annoying." She also proclaimed that she's "not jealous" of Kacie B., even though she can't refrain from making the "bitter bitch face" whenever she talks about her.

Having broken up with her boyfriend just to come on The Bachelor, Courtney has a lot riding on "winning."

Courtney went on to proclaim that she was going to turn the Group Date into her own 1-on-1 date, and she took Ben upstream and away from the other girls. Lindzi tried to interrupt their alone time and prove to Ben how outdoorsy she was, but her attempt proved to be awkward as Courtney caught the only fish of the date just as she arrived, prompting her to snark, "I think Lindzi should have stayed back and it would have been less awkward for her...I got a fish, and then her head almost popped off."

After making out with Kacie B. back at the mansion, Courtney got jealous and threatened Ben by telling him that she had "lost sight of everything...of us." This caused Ben to panic and change his mind on who he was going to give the Group Date Rose to, and he ended up giving it to Courtney just to reassure her. The normally sweet Kacie B. responded by saying, "I have this moment with him, and then he comes and gives the rose to Courtney - it pisses me off."

In a Bachelor 101 tactical error, Samantha L. tried a similar approach with Ben as Courtney did, demanding to know why she had been on 3 Group Dates, but not a single 1-on-1. Apparently Samantha was not hot enough for Ben, as he immediately informed her that he didn't "see this going very much further," and he sent her packing on the spot...Of course, there's also a rumor floating around that Samantha had fallen for one a producer who was married with kids, so that also might have played just a small role in why she was sent home.

The second 1-on-1 date went to Jennifer, who's a cute enough girl, but probably not one of the front-runners. Ben took her on a hike up to the top of a crater, which they repelled down and plunged into a pool of warm spa like water. Later, they took a gondola back down the crater, where they were treated to a concert by Clay Walker.

While it seemed like their date went well, this was probably the typical Bachelor example of the two hitting it off because of what they were doing, and not necessarily who they were with. If the two had done something say, having gone on a canoe ride, I'm not sure they would have hit it off.

Emily decided to tell Ben how Courtney is a giant bitch and not a good match for him. However, Ben warned her not to get consumed by Courtney, and urged her to stay focused on the two of them instead. As is always the case in The Bachelor, it's never a good idea to waste you time campaigning negatively against one of the other girls when you could be selling yourself, or as Courtney put it, "Why would she be so stupid to talk about me with (her) 1-on-1 time with him? What an idiot."

Courtney and and Emily then followed the girl playbook to a tee by getting passive aggressive and talking negatively about each other within earshot, but not actually saying anything directly to each other. One of the girls tried to break the tension by noting, "There are roses tonight, how do we feel about that?" That cause Courtney to snark, "I feel awesome about it because I already have one."

Much to Courtney's dismay, Emily ended up getting the final rose of the evening, with Monica coming up empty handed.

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