Thursday, April 12, 2012

Blogging Survivor: One World - "You gotta put on your big girl panties and make a big girl decision"

First things first. For those of you wondering after last week's exchange with Tarzan, Did Chelsea Meissner have a boob job? The answer is yes, and she acknowledged that she was "VERY happy with her plastic surgeon" on her Facebook page.

Even after Tarzan approached him about the men's lack of numbers against the women, Troy still remained delusional, thinking that he made the right move in going along with the women and voting off Michael. "I'm glad he's gone, he was gunning from me from day one, and I got sick of him."

The Reward Challenge involved tossing and wrapping two balls around post, which Colton easily won. Actually, the two balls were attached by a string, and the post had rungs that were worth different levels of points based on the degree of difficulty of the throw...kind of like the backyard or tailgate games you see.

With Tarzan securing the most points for his team, Jay, Kat, Troy, Alicia and Tarzan's soiled bikini briefs won a barbecue reward. Fueled by a few coconut rum drinks on the boat ride there, Troy's creepy "swimsuit photographer" side came out.

"If we could stay here tonight, I'd be golden. Let's get the girls all drunk," before yelling, "Skinny dipping in ten minutes," which I'm sure was a real consideration for the girls with Tarzan around.

I'm starting to doubt whether Troy really is a "swimsuit photographer," as I have to assume most female models would want their photographer in that situation to either be gay or asexual, not some creepy old guy who runs around talking about their "taters" and going skinny dipping.

For some reason, Jay decided to remain loyal to Kim and Chelsea, even though he questioned whether or not they were targeting him next, which they were. After talking strategy, the girls decided to target either Jay or Troy, depending upon whether one of them won Immunity.

Jay approached Kat to inform her that in order to stick with their plan of targeting the old Monano members, Alicia should be the next to go. While the rest of the girls gave one of the worst sell jobs ever by refusing to look him in the eyes, for some reason Jay fully bought it when they said they'd go along with his plan.

Sensing for the first time that there might actually be a hidden strategy behind the women targeting two men in a row, Troy said to Jay, "I just don't want them to try to pull some fast move." Jay remained blissfully ignorant when he said, "I really, really don't see that happening...I trust my two girls (Kim and Chelsea)."

The Immunity Challenge consisted of standing barefoot on a small wooden perch with a hand tethered to a bucket of water, with the last person to cause their bucket to dump winning Immunity.

Jeff Probst also revealed that the contestants would be offered various food temptations to induce them to drop out, much to the delight of the women who knew they were safe.

Before Jeff could finish saying "This challenge is officially on," let alone offer up a temptation to induce anyone to drop out, Tarzan dumped his bucket of water on his head. Likewise, Christina dumped her bucket seconds before Jeff finished offering milk and cookies to the first person willing to quit, which Sabrina quickly accepted.

Kim and Kat dropped out for a tray of cupcakes and milk, with Kim getting the cupcakes and milk, and Kat getting any scraps that fell to the floor and a belly rub.

Alicia tried to claim that while she was able to last long enough to win, she'd be willing to drop out and let Chelsea win instead. That caused Chelsea to question, "You'll let me, or you just want some damn food?" For the record, my money's on fatty just wanting "some damn food."

Sabrina did in fact drop out next for a bowl of candy and chocolate, leaving Chelsea pissed off and standing alone for the girls.

Troyzan lost his balance and bowed out without Immunity or any food. For some reason Jay gave up the shot at the Immunity Necklace that he so badly needed for chicken wings and beer, which became even more inexplicable when Chelsea gasped, "Oh my God - He don't even drink beer!"

Down to Chelsea and Leif, Chelsea informed him that by bowing out he'd be viewed as less of a threat. Initially content to continue playing, you could see the confusion set in on Leif's face when he was sarcastically egged on by Jeff asking whether or not he thought that was a fair exchange.

When Chelsea reassured him that he'd be viewed as less of a threat when he asked if that was true, Leif dropped out for the offer of burgers and a beer. Keep in mind that Chesea didn't promise him anything, she just confirmed that he'd be viewed as "less of a target."

After Chelsea won Immunity, Leif even went so far as to share his burgers with her, leading me to wonder whether guys are always so stupid when pretty girls are around, or if this is just an incredibly challenged group of male Survivor contestants this season?

I mean, Leif's clearly got some "Corky" in him, but what is the explanation from the rest of the men for handing the women numbers, not standing up to Colton (or at least forcing him to play his Immunity Idol) before he left the game due to illness, and not using Tarzan's underwear as a threat to the women to get them to vote out one of their weakest members like Alicia or Christina?

Umm, Leif...Unless you're Jerry Sandusky, that's not the way you're supposed to hold a baby.

Chelsea had struggled with Kim's plan to pick off the men after having told Jay and Troy that they could trust her, which caused Sabrina to question her loyalty. "Going to the end requires some big girl decisions. You gotta put on your big girl panties and make a big girl decision."

Apparently having put on a pair of Alicia's size XXL underwear, Chelsea eventually announced that she realized that she needed to break her loyalty to Jay and Troy if she wanted to make it to the end and win the money, which was, afterall, her top priority.

Alicia Rosa's "big girl" panties...Why is it that it's always that fat girls who wear Wal-mart leopard print underwear?

Kim and the girls decided to target Troy. Almost as if they had stolen the men's playbook, they also laid out a plan to throw a few votes Jay's way just in case Troy played an Immunity Idol.

Despite Kim's assurances, Troy began to suspect that the women were targeting him for a blindside, and he told Jay he was planning on playing an Immunity Idol that he had found.

Loyal like a cat and smart like a dog, Jay immediately told Kim that Troy was planning on playing an Idol, not realizing that was likely putting the target squarely on his back.

At Tribal Council, Jeff lead off by asking Troy whether Jonas and Michael going home first after the merge was an indication that it was still a game of men vs. women. He naively responded by saying, "I thought it was a coincidence," before acknowledging that he's since started to have his doubts.

Troy ended up playing his Idol as expected, which turned out to be a wasted play, as the women's alliance ended up sending four votes Jay's way thanks to the warning he gave Kim, effectively blindsiding him.

That left Troy without an Idol and to seriously ponder whether the two votes sent his way were any type of indication that his "alliance" with the women had fallen apart, or if it was merely another coincidence.

I'm sure this picture goes over well on the motocross circuit...Call it a blindside if you like, but Jay Byars got caught with his pants half down.

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