Friday, April 17, 2015

The Survivor Blog - "I still hate you."

This week's Survivor began with Jenn suddenly wanting quit the game because her BFF Hali got voted out, which made no sense at all considering that she had to know that she'll look so much prettier going forward without Hali standing next to her all the time.

Hali Ford might not be considered pretty outside of laws school, but she knows how to pick the right accessories that make her look better, like Jenn  Brown.  

The Reward Challenge saw the contestants divide into two teams and navigate an aquatic obstacle course in order to be the fastest to retrieve five rings floating in the water with a grappling hook.

With the winning team earning a trip to what Jeff Probst dubbed the "Chocolate Cafe," Dan, Sharin, Tyler, Mike and Sierra ended up winning unlimited candy bars, as well as unlimited trips to the rest room.

In a case of "I know what you've been doing, but you've been doing it wrong," Sierra came down with herpes on her neck, while Joe had an outbreak on his pecs.

While the others were away at their reward, Boston Guy successfully lobbied to kill a chicken, which all but eliminated Jenn's final ally in camp.

At the Immunity Challenge the contestants had to stand on their toes and use the top of their heads to keep a block pinned against a beam that was above them without slouching and letting it fall.

Joe finally lost his first Immunity Challenge, which allowed Tyler to claim Individual Immunity.

Back at camp, Joe claimed that he was going to play an Idol that he didn't have, so the jewelry maker went to work and constructed a fake Idol out of a stash of drift wood, sea shells and the remnants of Dan's underpants, all of which he had found washed up on the beach.

Joe Anglim may go down as the best all around player in the history of  Survivor who never made it longer than people like Shirin or Jenn Brown. 

Better yet, Joe promised to give Mike the fake Idol, but only if Mike promised to vote for Jenn instead of himself.

At Tribal Council, Jenn continued her half ass approach to staying in the game, even though she clearly wanted to go home, by trying to explain why she competed hard enough to finish second in the Immunity Challenge.

Jenn began by saying, "I don't like this, but I really do want this," before going on to state, "It would be really cool to win that necklace."

Of course, she said she would have just given the Idol to Joe had she won it just to mix things up given that everyone was planning on voting for him, so it was all clearly just a game to her.

However, when Jeff offered Jenn the chance to do the right thing and let Joe stay in the game by simply walking away, Jenn refused and selfishly stated, "That's quitting, and I don't do quitting."

Joe made it known that he wanted to stay in the game that he loved and lobbied against Jenn by saying, "She's already quit mentally, emotionally and physically."

Joe also noted how people might be willing to take Jenn all the way to the end because she didn't give a shit anymore, which come to think of it, just might have been her plan all along.

Mike then asked Jeff Probst to verify the fake Immunity Idol that Joe had given him, which Jeff refused to do until he officially played it.

In what turned out to be a confusing vote to the non-power players, Tyler cast his vote for Jenn but said, "I have no idea what is going on."

Likewise, Boston Guy voted for Joe while saying, "I have no idea what is going to happen tonight."

And when Mike got up and played Joe's fake Immunity Idol by announcing, "I'm going to play it for Will," Jeff informed him, "This is NOT a Hidden Immunity Idol. Any votes cast for Will will still count."

Fortunately for Will, nobody voted for him, and it all came down to Joe and Jenn.

And Just as the final vote was about to be read with Jenn and Joe tied 4 to 4, Jenn gushed, "This is exciting," almost as if she was sailing around the world on a whim in a yacht that her parents had given her.

Upon hearing Jeff say that it was Joe who was voted out, Shirin, in her first likable moment all season, looked at Jenn and said while sneering, "I still hate you."

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