Thursday, March 27, 2014

SURVIVOR: Brawn vs. Brains vs. Beauty - "You disgust me. Everything about you is annoying, your laugh, your teeth, your face."



This week's Survivor began with Trish trying to make amends to the rest of the Solari Tribe for blindsiding Cliff. 

But when an upset Lindsey warned, "You guys just screwed up majorly," Trish couldn't contain how ugly she was.

"Let me make this really clear to you moving forward. I don't respect you because this is a team moving forward, and I don't like you."

And after Trish said that, Lindsey lost her shit and went the fuck off:
"You know what, you disgust me. Everything about you is annoying, your laugh, your teeth, your face. Everything about you I cannot stand, so how bout you just back off a little bit, and shut up and not talk to me for a little while...I think that your annoying, I think that your terrible, I think you might be the most horrific person I've ever met in my life."

Trisha on Survivor's teeth...Advantage Lindsey!

However, after that exchange Lindsey walked off into the wild in nothing but her bra and underwear, which was apparently enough to bring Jeff Probst out of the wood works.

Unfortunately, Lindsey informed Jeff that she wanted to go home because she was afraid that she was going to hurt Trish.

"I'm going to flip out on her...I need a million dollars more than anyone here...I'd rather cost me a million dollars than for my daughter to see her momma like that."

And while I believed her, that just seemed to fuel Tony's ego.

"Just as we expected, you turn the head and the body always follows. She was the body, Cliff was the head."

LJ tried to explain the same thing in terms that Southern people could understand. "That obviously was a huge volatile zit waitin' to pop."

The Reward Challenge consisted of a series of 1-on-1 battles, with the competitors trying to hold on to an Idol on platform while trying to knock their opponent's off.

The Solana Tribe ended up winning, with the reward being a chance to raid the Aparri Tribe for supplies.

Solana elected to send Woo and Tony, who took Aparri's  blankets, pillows and fishing gear.

They also decided to give "a clue" to the Hidden Immunity Idol to Jeremiah in order to make him a target, especially since the clue wasn't even for his tribe.

But since Tony and Woo took the clue with them, Jeremiah had no way to prove it.

Once Tony got back to Solana's camp, he was so proud of himself that he finally told the rest of the tribe that he actually was a cop instead of a construction worker...Like there's a difference.

Or as LJ said, "So to solidify that Tony is trustworthy, he told us he lied. Different."

With everyone blurting out the truth, Trisha apparently felt compelled to join in, because she yelled, "I'm going to admit something to you guys that I haven't admitted, I'm really a man!"

And sadly that just confused me, because I was pretty sure that everybody already thought that Trisha was dude.

The Immunity Challenge required the teams to race through an obstacle course, maneuver a key through rope maze, chop through a rope to get puzzle pieces, and solve that puzzle to get the winning combination.

But when Solana ended up winning, Tony yelled, "Top five, we made the final five!"

That caused his Donuts r' Us alliance member Sarah to notice, "I wasn't standing over there, so I think that's a pretty tell tale sign that I'm not included in their future plans."

So much for swearing to each other on their badges.

Of course, even with five on his side and Aparri going to this week's Tribal Council, Tony still didn't have numbers going forward, as Solana still had them outnumbered 6-5. 

Even the intellectually challenged Jeremiah noticed saying, "Tony made the dumbest mistake on Earth by yelling out 'Top Five.'"

At Tribal Council Alexis got blindsided, meaning the last two hot girls both left unexpectedly. I guess I'll have to see if I still have it in myself to blog again next week.

Alexis Maxwell posing in her underwear

...Sigh.

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