Blogging Big Brother 15 - "I’m just trying to be cool and you’re snapping like a little Chihuahua, mommy"

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This week's episodes began with McCrae in tears after the house voted to evict his closest friend, Judd. “I didn’t think I’d care about these people, but I’m a big woosie I guess.”

The HOH Competition required the contestants to square off one-on-one and balance a "cherry" (a ball) down a curved board and drop it into a "banana split" (a cup) the fastest without the ball falling off the edge. 

With McCrae squaring off against his girlfriend, Amanda threatened, "McCrae better let me win this challenge or we’ll be banana splitting up."

Sure enough, Amanda lost to McCrae, who didn't even appear to take the competition seriously.

And even though Andy secured HOH for their alliance by defeating McCrae in the finals, Amanda threw a tantrum at McCrae because he didn't let her win...And well, she really, really wanted to win for a change.

Of course, Amanda failed to grasp the concept that it doesn't make you a winner if you get your boyfriend to throw a competition in your favor, it just makes you a spoiled little bitch. 

After Amanda literally stopped crying put on her big girl panties, she made a Final Four deal with Aaryn, Andy and McCrae that they dubbed "3AM."

With Andy tipping Amanda and McRae off that Helen was sending out feelers to backdoor them, McCrae and Andy made fake Final Three alliance with Helen at Amanda’s suggestion.

That caused Helen to gush, “McCrae has finally woken up…If he wants to win this game, he needs to cut Amanda loose.”

Still holding a personal grudge towards Jessie after their fight last week, Amanda lobbied against her arguing that she had to go now because “she wants to make a big move.”

In actuality, the closest Jessie Kowalski came to making a "big move" was nearly flashing America her goods while adjusting her panties on Big Brother After Dark.

Andy correctly guessed that the Veto Competition would be the summer's annual counting competition.

With the contestants having to guess the number of items on display and either fold, or stay and risk elimination if their guess was the furthest away, Amanda put together a plan for everyone but Helen to fold in order to keep her trust and knock Jessie out.

While brilliant in theory, Amanda ignored one important variable, the fact that Spencer was not part of her alliance and that he was competing to get himself off of the nomination block.

Sure enough, Spencer wasn't having any part of Amanda's plan. “They want me to throw a Veto Competition the week I’m on the block? What do they think, that I’m some kind of rube?”

And when Spencer elected to play and knocked Helen out, Spencer said, "Oops! I can hear Amanda saying 'there goes the plan.'"

With the first person guessing closest to the actual amount the most number of times without being eliminated winning the POV, the competition came down to the final round.

And with the POV on the line for one final guess, Elissa folded....Even though there were no more rounds to wait for.

However, Andy was still able to win the Veto over Spencer, who the "3AM" alliance immediately contemplated getting rid of over Jessie because they couldn't manipulate him.

As usual, Amanda took things personally even though Spencer was on the block and had no reason to trust her.

"Spencer messing up my strategy for the Veto really makes me mad. It was a glorious, glorious plan."

Jessie and Helen tried to flip Andy and get him to put Amanda up, not realizing that he was Amanda's closest ally aside this side of McCrae's penis.

With Jessie doing her best to dig her own grave, Spencer made a huge mistake at the Veto Ceremony by telling Andy, “You haven’t done anything intelligent all week, and I don’t expect you to start now.”

Sure enough, Andy didn’t use Veto, although the "3AM" alliance had considered backdooring Helen. 

Jessie confronted Helen for passive aggressively throwing her under the bus in front of the house by implying that she might have been a rat.

And when Helen told Jessie that she was upset at her because she tried to get Amanda out, Jessie lost her shit, and rightfully so since Helen had been working just as hard as she was to get Amanda out.

That caused Jessie to go straight to Amanda and admit that she was targeted her...Along with Helen and Elissa.

That in turn prompted Amanda to call a house meeting, where Helen denied any plan to get Amanda out.

After listening in on Jessie confronting Helen in private, Andy said, “Jessie is absolutely right, Helen has come to me about getting Amanda out of the house.”

With turnabout being fair play, Jessie listened in and heard the "3AM" alliance laughing about how their plan was to evict her even though they had been telling her she was safe.

Jessie then called Andy out by saying, “I know everything now. I was listening through the wall. I’m going to tell everybody.”

A panicked Andy asked, “What did you hear?" That caused Jessie to snark, “What do you think I heard Andy? Take a guess.”

Jessie announced that her plan was “To blow everybody’s shit out of the water this week. So you all sit back and just watch the show,” and she started by telling GinaMarie that Aaryn talked shit about her "all the time."

GinaMarie let Aaryn know Jessie had said that, but told her that she was cool with it. However, not knowing how to react to getting caught, Aaryn's natural instincts kicked in and she snapped at GinaMarie.

“Just don’t tell me not to be upset when somebody brings my name up like that…I’m not going to sit here and fucking let you talk to me like that.”

Trying to calm her down, GinaMarie responded by saying “I’m cool, mommy, I’m cool. I’m just sitting here relaxing…If  you want to bring it up to her and start a fight, go ahead."

However, that had the opposite affect. “I don’t know why you’re still talking…You’re annoying right now.”

That's when GinaMarie finally lost it. "You better check yourself  again...C’mon Aaryn, bring it Aaryn!"

And when GinaMarie followed her down stairs to antagonize her, Aaryn screamed, “Leave me the fuck alone!”

When GinaMarie told her, “You’re yelling like a psychopath, again,” Aaryn asked, “Again?” Perhaps realizing for the first time that she had been making herself look like an ass all summer.

When GinaMarie decided to wake the entire house up the entire house up to weigh in on their fight, a more than pleased Jessie jumped up and exclaimed, "I’m awake," raising her hand and hopping up and down.

A dumbfounded Aaryn complained, “Like, I don’t even know what’s happening right now."

And when GinaMarie brought the entire house up to the HOH Room, Aaryn yelled at her, “Why are we still talking about this?”

GinaMarie responded in true confusing GinaMarie fashion. "I’m just trying to be cool and you’re snapping like a little Chihuahua, mommy."

And while I'm not entirely sure that GinaMarie ever explained to the house why they were fighting in the first place to make Aaryn look bad, it at least made for some good drama.

Despite her best efforts to stir up the house, Jessie was still voted out 6-0, probably because she never really put the information she had on Helen, Aaryn or Andy to good use strategic use.

Sure enough, Andy, who cries at evictions like he cries at weddings, teared up when Jessie left the house, and I don't think he even liked her.

Upon her exit interview Jessie bemoaned. “I came in expecting a buddy, a friend or even a showmance, and it didn’t work out,” which is precisely why she's an single and unemployed dog mom back home in Texas. 

The HOH Competition required the contestants to go head-to-head and determine whether a song was describing a past HOH, Have/Have-Not or Veto Competition the fastest.

Aaryn ended up winning over Amanda, giving Aaryn her third HOH of the summer.

Connie Chung then announced to America, but not the houseguests, that one of the Jury members would be returning to the game next Thursday based upon the results of a yet to be played competition, which is sure to make things interesting.

Big Brother 15 Power Ratings - Each week I'm going rank the Big Brother contestants based upon their power and vulnerability within the house. Here's how the contestants break down after the seventh week:

8. GinaMarie Zimmerman - Is it just me, or does GinaMarie just an over the top parody of the character "Magda" in Something about Mary?

7. Spencer Clawson - Spencer claims he wrote a screen play in college that he titled "Knocked Up" that his professor stole the idea for and sold to Hollywood.

6. Aaryn Gries - Aaryn's social game is so bad that Andy, Spencer and McCrae made a suicide pact in the event that Aaryn or GinaMarie were to vote them out of the house.

5. Rachel Reilly's Sister - As a dietitian, Elissa seems convinced that GinaMarie has an eating disorder.

If GinaMarie Zimmerman does have an eating disorder, somebody forgot to tell her about the part where she's supposed to make herself throw up.

4. Helen Kim - Plotting against her own alliance with people who are not truly loyal to her, Helen may have schemed her ticket right out of the game.

3. Amanda Zuckerman - When McCrae danced around after being named the host of the Veto Competition Amanda sarcastically complained, “That’s not embarrassing.”

McCrae Olson

Of course, Amanda Zuckerman's the girl who's flashed boobs and walks around house in panties three sizes to small for her giant ass.

2. Andy Herren - Perhaps getting a little too cocky for the first time in his life, Andy playfully asked, "It's time for everyone's favorite game, what are Candice and Judd doing right now?" And while Andy's done a pretty good job of predicting the various twists and sequence of competitions this summer, he seemed completely unaware that they were preparing to compete in an event to get back into the house.


1. McCrae Olson - On Big Brother After Dark McCrae and Amanda finally got "Big Brother married."

...With Andy Herren presiding and reading inappropriate Bible versus while dressed as a vampire.

"54 days ago when we walked into the Big Brother house a couple met. And when they met, who knew that true love was going to spark...Sadly, that romance was cut short after 13 days when David was evicted. After that, the second best couple in the house started canoodling."

Andy concluded the ceremony by asking, "Amanda do you take McCrae to be your lawfully wedded spouse? And if you don't, the entire house will be coming after you next week."

Big Brother 15 Blog - "Just sit there and look semi-pretty."

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As the contestants continued treading on rolling barrels in a strenuous HOH Competition, GinaMarie felt she was getting her first workout of the summer.

“Ooh, my butt is going feel nice and plump tomorrow.”

Fast forwarding until "tomorrow" and GinaMarie Zimmerman's butt was definitely plump, but not nice...But maybe it just needed another day to ripen.

As the final two, McCrae was offered a deal to keep Amanda and himself safe and make one of GinaMarie's nominations if he'd just let her win HOH.

While McCrae was reluctant to drop out due to strategic reasons, GinaMarie had her own reason for fighting so hard for the HOH Room. “I need this, I need my hair dye!”

McCrae was confident that he could win without even having to make a deal.

“I’ve got carnie blood in me. I don’t work out ever. For some reason this competition is really suited to me, so it seems like everything is coming out McCrae.”

Unfortunately, McCrae's cockiness got the best of him, as he ended up tripping and falling off of his barrel, giving GinaMarie HOH before anything was officially promised to him in return.

Having won, GinaMarie then promptly face planted worse than anybody else who had fell as she simply tried to step off her barrel.

With the first three contestants out of the competition receiving "mystery boxes," Spencer’s contained a blow horn that he was forced to speak through until the nominations were announced.

As Spencer said, that made it difficult for him to have any type of private conversation.

Candice and Helen both received prizes, with Candice getting $5,000, and Helen winning a backyard BBQ to which she could invite two other houseguests.

GinaMarie made her first priority as HOH to get rid of Candice.

"Candice is a target for me this week: A) she picks on my girl Aaryn, B) I can’t stand her freaking voice in my ear all the time. C) She starts so much drama…D) She's black." Okay, I made D) up...but GinaMarie still thought it.

The HOH Room contained a picture of GinaMarie Zimmerman and Nick Uhas. That caused Aaryn to say, “Great, a picture of Nick. Really? I just spent the last two weeks trying to wean her off of him, and now she’s right back on the crazy train.

Andy was less than impressed with the luxury items that GinaMarie received as HOH.

"GinaMarie is 32-years-old, but all the things in her room insinuate that she's 15. I mean she has crowns from pageants, she has dresses from pageants…She’s got music that a 15-year-old girl would love, and she has a picture of a boy that she had a very intense crush on."

Helen's plan to bring Aaryn along with Elissa to her backyard BBQ infuriated Jessie, who felt like she was more deserving.

After Jessie bitched on and on about not getting invited, Amanda quipped in the diary room, “Just sit there, shut up, and look semi-pretty."

Asked why it was such a big deal, Jessie whined, “It's a huge deal. To be able to drink, it's a huge deal.”

And when Jessie took her moping to yet another level by complaining, “I don’t even want to be in the house right now at all. I’m just over the fakeness," Amanda said "Let's talk about fakeness."

Amanda then let Jessie know that she was aware that she woke Andy up at 4 a.m. the prior morning with a secret plan to back door Amanda and vote her out.

"So don’t there and be a little fucking girl and cry about not getting invited to a BBQ when you were contemplating flipping the house."

And when Amanda finished by saying, "Why don’t you go cry in the corner," Jessie showed Amanda by going to the Diary Room instead...Where she proceeded to lose her shit and cry just as Amanda had predicted.

McCrae later tried to explain to Jessie why she was in the position she was in. “When you say stuff about loyalty and trust and you’re the one flipping the house, it’s tough for you to have any credibility.

And when Jessie responded that she had been presented with a plan that she simply wanted to ask Andy about, Amanda said, “The fact that you even had to ask anybody else, that’s scary to me.”

Amanda then proceeded to try and read Jessie the riot act. “You're acting like a not sane person. You’re attention seeking, you're crazy.”

However, Jessie got the best jab of round two in when she responded, “I’m attention seeking? You’re in your underwear!”

Jessie Kowalski may have been on to something, as why someone with a big gut and fat ass like Amanda Zuckerman would walk around in nothing but a pair of panties and a shirt tied above her belly is beyond me.

Jessie went on to say, "Maybe that’s my personality," to which Amanda responded, “Well, that sucks.”

Fortunately, Amanda Zuckerman and Jessie Kowalski then made up when Jessie promised to shove her head up her ass. That caused Amanda to say, "You're head is literally up my asshole...Do it again!"

Thinking that she had won a decisive victory, McCrae put Amanda in her place by telling her to stop being a bully saying, “It makes both of you look bad.”

And when Amanda selfishly said that she now wanted to get Jessie out, McCrae pleaded with her to stick with their plan, and not her personal agenda.

Of course, Amanda got irritated with McCrae for not backing her and letting Jessie sit next to him.

That caused McCrae to comment, “In my head right now is just like me thinking about how this sounds like so many relationships I’ve been in. I’d do anything just to be able to scratch through the drywall and just get out of here.”

In making her nominations, GinaMarie told Candice that she was a drama queen, a tattletale and a rat…but that she liked her other than that.

She then went on to call Jessie a “flip-flopper," saying, "that’s even worse in my book.”

GinaMarie later told Jessie that she was not her target, and apologized for calling her a "flip-flopper.”

In regards to the MVP, Amanda felt, “I am very, very confident that someone in the house.”

Why did she feel that way? Because she arrogantly felt, “Nobody would vote for me to go on the block…What am I doing that nobody doesn’t like?”

Right on cue came Amanda getting nominated for eviction via America's MVP, which blew her mind and caused her to speculate that Judd was MVP.

Speaking of Judd, the Veto Competition involved tossing (fake) frogs at numbered targets floating in a pond.

“I’m just thinking this is just right up my ally. I love anything frog related. I love frog gigging, frog legs, I love anything frog related."

During the competition, Candice told Judd that Amanda had been talking shit about him the night before.

Sensing that she was about to get exposed, Amanda yelled, "Candice, are you talking shit up there?…Why don’t you shut your big fat mouth?

That caused Candice to snap, “I can talk, it’s my mouth.”

Apparently Amanda's enormous ego didn't even want Aaryn and GinaMarie to be the most racist people in the house, because Amanda went on to taunt, "That’s the 'Shaniqua' coming out of you I guess."

And when Amanda rhetorically asked, "Am I racist now?" America answered yes. 

Later, on Big Brother After Dark Spencer teased, “I do think that your 'Shaniqua' comment trumped Aaryn’s by far as being slurish."

In fact, even Elissa from North Carolina said, "I feel like Amanda took it 100 steps too far. Derogatory comments just are inappropriate anywhere, any time."

Not content to be known just as yet another Big Brother racist, Amanda kept pushing things further, saying, "No wonder people made fun of you in school, because you act like a fool."

Amanda then finished Candice off by saying, "Up your nose with a rubber hose."

As the one gay man unable to deal with any sort of drama, Andy yelled, “Stop! Both of you, stop!”

Sure enough, Candice whiffed on her frog toss, causing Amanda to taunt, “Oopsie, that sucks Candice. Gosh, I feel so bad for you."

And as Amanda continued to taunt her as they stood together amongst the other eliminated players, Candice finally said, "Shut the fuck up and be quiet and leave me alone, and I will leave you alone."

With each player winning a prize/punishment subject to being traded to a player finishing higher, Judd won the POV Competition.

After trades, Amanda wound up with the Jersey Shore spray tan that GinaMarie begged for (even though it was a punishment), GinaMarie was forced to wear the "Cone of shame," and Candice was required to dress in a "Clownie-tard" inspired by Aaryn's creepy stuffed clown doll.

Upon putting on the Clownie-tard, Candice Stewart said, "It’s truly going to be hard to get a husband after this," forgetting for a moment that she was raised "white."

And while Judd won the competition, he let Jessie keep the Power of Veto and took $5,000 from Candice instead. 

Once again, McCrae was pissed that Amanda started conflict at the POV Competition.

“You won’t shut the fuck up...You’re on the block…You could be going home…You’re running your mouth being a bully…She’s going home, and you just want to rub salt in it…You just make yourself look like an ass.”

Meanwhile, GinaMarie played in the tub, fully utilizing her powers as HOH.

Even the "Cone of Shame" was embarrassed to be seen around GinaMarie Zimmerman.

With a free pass from Judd, Jessie used the Power of Veto on herself, which forced GinaMarie to put up Spencer as a replacement nominee. 

Judd tried to warn Amanda not to have anymore emotional outbursts since it was putting a target on her.

Of course, that caused Amanda to say that Judd was not loyal to her, and that she was convinced that he was the past week's MVP.

Jessie tried to organize a plan to get Amanda out saying, “She’s been running it since week one, you know it and I know it.” She even kissed Judd for the first time to sell it, showing that she really was serious.

However, Andy, as usual, was not on board to make a big move given that he's the game's ultimate floater. 

Connie Chung announced that for the first time ever that there would be 9 jury members, which would begin with a surprise Double Eviction.

Additionally, Connie Chung hinted that going to the Jury House would not necessarily send an eliminated contestant out of the game.

In her pre-vote eviction speech, Candice called GinaMarie out for saying she was a rat during nominations.

And when Candice was unanimously voted out, Candice left by saying, “Bye, go back to your mom's house” to GinaMarie, even though she was the one going home...But the bitches hate each other, so who really cared, right?

That caused Gina Marie to say, “Nobody likes you, nobody wants you, even your own mother...At least my mom likes me, unlike yours," referencing Candice having been adopted. 

That caused Helen to say, “That comment did not need to be said,” and even Aaryn, the most racist houseguest in history acknowledged that GinaMarie was a "bitch."

Candice responded by saying, “Take your tongue ring out and your colored contacts, that was so ten years ago,” and referenced GinaMarie's pagaent win by asking, “A crown for what, Miss used to be fat America?”

Candice arrived for her post eviction interview by saying, "Sorry about all that Julie," and reminded America, "I’m a lovely person inside and out" for like the the 100th time this summer.

Of course, that was something that she kept telling herself over and over again throughout the season...Almost as if she had been seeing a psychiatrist and taking medication.

With a double eviction, the new HOH required the contestants to guess whether “More or Less” when it came to counting random items around the house.

Aaryn ended up winning HOH, and had to immediately make her nominations, Jessie and Spencer.

With an immediate Veto Competition to follow, Julie announced that the MVP was over for the summer, and that for the first time this season there would only be two nominees.

The Veto Competition required the contestants to go to a tool box and retrieve nails of various lengths in order to complete puzzle.

On a streak of dominance, Aaryn won Veto and took Jessie off the block. "I have to put this person up because they are playing me, and think I would not realize that….Judd.  Everyone minus two people want this."

When Judd asked why she was smiling, Jessie said, “I’m just happy that I’m staying, not that you’re going,” to which Judd replied, “The snake wins the game.”

On the block with no time to lobby for his position in the house given the double eviction, Judd pleaded, “Please change your vote,”as he looked at each houseguest in the eyes.

And while Judd was unanimously evicted, nearly everyone cried...or at least Andy did, because he was such a good guy.

But not Helen, who ran to Aaryn and said, “You are Janelle, that was so humongous…He’s a schemer!” 

When Connie Chung asked Judd, "What happened?" he could only say, “I got the big ole blindside tonight…I’m more confused than anybody, I guess I need to watch the footage and find out.”

Big Brother 15 Power Ratings - Each week I'm going rank the Big Brother contestants based upon their power and vulnerability within the house. Here's how the contestants break down after the sixth week:

9. GinaMarie Zimmerman - As HOH, GinaMarie took a bath in a thong as she talked to the fish tank saying“Fishies” in high pitched voice, as if they would come to her like dogs. 

With a cone over her mouth, all we need is something to cover GinaMarie Zimmerman's bare-ass.

8. Spencer Clawson - Spencer made his biggest contribution to the house all summer when he said, “I’m going to go fuck with people with my blow horn.”

7. Jessie Kowalski - Really, with a poor social game, Jessie doesn't have too much going for her.

Jessie Kowalski has nice boobs.

6. Aaryn Gries - Aaryn has improved her position by being loyal to Helen, Elissa and Amanda. It looks like they'll keep her around as long as they can use and control her.

Aaryn Gries' ass.

5. Rachel Reilly's Sister - I have Rachel Reilly's sister moving up this week, mainly because Helen is in a position of power and considers Elissa her #2, even though she's not in as well with the rest of Helen's alliance.

4. Amanda Zuckerman - As punishment for her racist remarks towards Candice, Amanda was forced to learn what it’s like to be black…Kind of like the movie Soul Man, but in reverse.

Amanda Zukerman: As punishment for her racist for "Shaniqua" comment towards Candice, Big Brother made Amanda put on makeup so she would learn what it's like to be a black person...Kind of like the movie Soul Man, only not as politically correct. 

3. Andy Herren - In response to GinaMarie and Aaryn's celebration over GinaMarie winning HOH Andy said, "I’ve gotten very far in this game being everyone’s friends, but watching GinaMarie and Aaryn dance around is so dumb,  I’m dying a little bit inside as I watch it."

And while Aaryn and GinaMarie played Ring Around the Rosie, Andy Herren kicks it old school as the Tri-State Area Break-dance Champion of 1986.

2. McCrae Olson -It's kind of funny when America is wondering what a pizza delivery boy like McCrae is doing staying with a high end real estate agent with gigantic fake boobs like Amanda.

1. Helen Kim -Someone is going to eventually target Helen, aren't they?

The Big Brother 15 Blog - "You told me that you wished that she choked on her saliva, and a boob would pop out, and she would die"

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Last week we left off with Aaryn winning the HOH. A tearful Elissa probably summed up the house reaction best when she said, “Aaryn wins HOH, and I’m speechless.”

Thinking that winning HOH gave her the right to be racist again, Aaryn told Candice, “You got me saying axed (instead of asked).”

However, Candice didn't take the bait saying, "I’m took that with a grain of salt. Clearly, I’m a speech therapist, so I know to talk," making Aaryn seem like the redneck farmer she really is.

Fortunately for Candice, Aaryn's nominations went to Helen based upon a prior deal that kept Aaryn safe. That meant that Spencer and Howard went on the block.

On the block, Howard delivered what he hoped would be a game changing speech to the rest of the house to play their own games.

However, Howard's speech even caused Judd to say, “People say I’m hard to understand, but I have no idea what Howard is talking about.”

Thinking that he had sealed the deal, Howard said, "I’m glad I got that off my chest. Message delivered. Message received. Done deal."

On the other hand, Spencer was more than pleased that Spencer rambled on while staring people down. "Major fail...This is great, Howard’s got everyone convinced that he’s gunning after them." 

In a bit of a surprise, America nominated Amanda as the third nomination, although she was convinced that the MVP who put her up was Howard.

McCrae agreed, “He just fucked you...Obviously Howard, I’d bet like a thousand like a bazillion dollars." 

Never one to make a correct assumption, Aaryn agreed. “So now it’s definitely not America.”

Amanda confronted Howard about being MVP, who correctly surmised, "it might be America." 

Howard being correct proved to be too much for Amanda to handle. "This is exactly why I want Howard to leave…I can’t manipulate him. He has to leave."

The Veto Competition required the contestants to find puzzle pieces in the yard and assemble a Veto Symbol.

Aaryn protested saying, “I don’t like puzzles, I don’t do puzzles," noting how she usually has her mother do them for her. 

Spencer ended up winning the Veto and used it on himself.

When Aaryn complained, "Candice has been the primary cause of every single thing I’ve gone through."

And since Aaryn was really referring to black people in general when she said "Candice," it didn't come as any surprise when she put up Candice as her replacement nominee for Spencer.

Candice was not at all happy that Aaryn targeted her again after being subjected to racial slurs from her earlier in the summer.

"In true redneck fashion, of course Aaryn puts me on the block. She even threw in a ‘saddle up girl'...She should’ve just said, ‘grab your rebel flag, black people on the block!’”

Being the little tattle tale that he is, Andy told Amanda that he made a fake alliance with Howard and Spencer.

Of course, that caused Amanda to confront Spencer, although that didn't go so well for her.

“I know what you think that you‘re doing, but it‘s not going to work. It‘s going to make yourself more of a target...Don’t go against me, because that’s going to hurt you.”

However, Spencer wasn't at all ready to take any shit from a woman, and especially a Jewish woman from New York.

“I don’t really give a fuck Amanda...You try to like threaten people and you try to act like your this badass, but I’m not some punk bitch who’s going to kiss your ass. I know you’re the reason that I’m up on the block this week." 

And when Amanda said, ”I don’t have that much power, but I appreciate," Spencer interrupted her like any guy from Arkansas would and said, "Shut up Amanda!”

And being a strong Jewish woman from New York, Amanda said, “Don’t you tell me to shut up...Who tells’ a woman to shut up?”

And officially winning the argument, Spencer snapped, “I do, when you need to listen," officially making the scoreboard read: Men-1, Women-0.

Of course, Helen overheard the argument and told Candice that Spencer said was targeting her, even though he only said that to Amanda to cover his ass when she confronted him about targeting her.

Not realizing that Spencer wasn't really targeting her, Candice freaked out and calls house meeting just to call Spencer out, and as Amanda said, “House meetings always go very well.”

Sure as shit, Candice sold Spencer out for targeting Amanda.

“Last night you said you would rally an army to get her out. You told me that you wished that she choked on her saliva, and a boob would pop out, and she would die."

And with that, Spencer had very little grounds to argue back, because that's pretty much exactly what someone who hated Amanda would've said if they were targeting her. 

Candice then concluded by saying, "I wish to God you’d keep my name out-your-mouth…Thank you, the meeting is adjourned!"

Proving that stupid doesn't recognize stupid, Aaryn suspected that Judd was playing the entire house. “Judd is a brilliant, brilliant human being."

And with that statement fresh out of Aaryn's mouth, Big Brother cut away to a clip of people from Judd's hometown of Englewood, Tennessee reacting to him being on the show.

That was actually surprising considering that Judd had said on Big Brother After Dark that his parents didn’t care at all about him on the show, and that they didn’t say goodbye to each other.

That spurred comments like, "Judd being on BB is probably the biggest thing since electricity," and, "I hope he doesn’t get all big town on us."

Big Brother didn't say whether or not Judd Daughtery is related to "Town Fan" Eugene, but given that he's from Englewood, Tennessee, I'm guessing that it's pretty safe to bet that they are.

In her pre-vote eviction speech, Amanda announced that she is "Big Brother engaged" to McCrae, whatever that means.

I'm pretty sure that Amanda Zuckerman's pre-show boyfriend was none too pleased that he was dumped for a pizza delivery boy who couldn't even afford to buy her the fake boobs that he had bought her.

In a 7-1 vote, Howard was evicted, becoming the first person involved in this summers racism scandal to be interviewed by Connie Chung.

"Why not confront the racism and say, 'I’m not going to put up with this?'”

Having taken the high road when it came to racists like Aaryn Gries and GinaMarie Zimmerman, Howard said he didn’t want to bring his temper out, which sounded like it might resemble the kid in The Perks of Being a Wallflower, or at least George McFly in Back to the Future when he finally let Biff have it.

In her parting video to Howard, Candice told him, “I hope we can continue our friendship outside of this house, and maybe ‘go sailing,” which was clearly a metaphor for sex since no black people actually sail.

We left of with the new HOH Competition, which required the competitors to hold on to bull head connected to them by a rope over a china cabinet while balancing on a spinning barrel.

And while Connie Chung offered mystery boxes to the first three players to drop out, one of which contained $5,000, there were no takers when the episode left off with the competition still in progress.

More importantly we learned that, unbeknownst to the houseguests, next week would be a double eviction week.

Big Brother 15 Power Ratings - Each week I'm going rank the Big Brother contestants based upon their power and vulnerability within the house. Here's how the contestants break down after the fifth week:

11. Aaryn Gries - Aaryn may not go down as the best or the smartest player to ever appear on Big Brother...

Aaryn Gries: But at least she's responsible for CBS adding a new viewer discretion disclaimer before the show as a result of her racist remarks.

10. GinaMarie Zimmerman - As Aaryn's partner in racism, GinaMarie was oblivious to the way that America, and her former employer, are viewing her on the show.

“I personally want to go home with something. I don’t necessary need to go home with $500,000…If I can go home with some chunk of change…Even if I go home with America’s Favorite Player, I’m freakin happy, because that’s 25 grand.”

GinaMarie Zimmerman's parents...That seems about right.

9. Rachel Reilly's Sister - Oh Jesus, not more Elissa Yoga poses!

Not realizing that wrapping yourself in Saran wrap while doing yoga makes you look stupid no matter where you are, Elissa Slater said, "I wish we had a gym, or like somewhere to work out where you don’t look so stupid.”

8.  Candice Stewart - If Candice Stewart doesn't win $25,000 for America's Favorite Player this year given all the racist crap she's had to deal with this season, something's wrong with America.

7. Spencer Clawson - Spencer seems like the kind of guy who would anally rape you if you passed out early at a party in college.


6. Jessie Kowalski - Jessie Kowalski may be in trouble after she stole and Herron's lips. 

Andy Herron looks like a bad burn victim, while Jessie Kowalski looks like...Well, Elissa Slater.

5. Judd Daughtery - After seeing this profile, I'm actually considering rescuing Judd from the local animal shelter in Englewood, TN.

4. Amanda Zuckerman - Amanda's her own worst enemy in this game, as the only thing bigger than her fake boobs is the target that she's painted on her chest using only her mouth. It's only a matter of time before somebody decides that Amanda and McCrae need to be split apart.


3. Andy Herren - Something just came to me...

I never realized that Don Knotts was gay...I guess I should've saw the signs.

2. McCrae Olson -It's kind of funny when America is wondering what a guy like McCrae is doing with a girl like Amanda.

Clearly McCrae Olson is above Amanda Zuckerman, no matter how much more money she makes than he does.

1. Helen Kim - really think that if somebody would just challenge Helen's power, she'd leave the show crying. Unfortunately, nobody has been brave enough to do so.

The Bachelorette Blog - "How could I not have loved him from the beginning?"

This week week marked the final episode of The Bachelorette, where Desiree Hartsock had to make the decision of whether or not to select a consolation prize or just go home after Brooks left her to explore his sexuality.

The question remained whether or not Chris would be willing to accept being 1st runner up after the real winner, Brooks, was both unwilling and unable to fulfill his duties.

Oh yeah, I almost forgot that Drew was still around too...Well, at least for a few minutes.

Des decided that while she wasn't ready to give up and go home empty handed, she did need one more date with both Chris and Drew before she was ready to take either of them to meet her family.

"If I can't see a future, for me it's over."

As Des broke the news to the guys, Chris was clearly choked up seeing her hurting, while Drew seamed rather oblivious.

First up was Drew, who spent an awkward five minutes assuring Des that HE was okay on a horseback ride to a beach before she promptly sent him home for a lack of chemistry, much like Brooks walked out on her.

Things went better for Chris, who actually seemed concerned for Des and her state of mind after she had her heart "Brooken."

"Seeing Chris walk up just felt different than Drew, in a good way."

After re-connecting with Des, Chris gave her a journal with all of the poems he had read to her handwritten in the back.

It was at that point that Des seemed to realize that she should have been pursuing him the way she had been chasing after Brooks all along.

"I've never felt like anyone has loved me as much as I've loved them...How could I not have loved him from the beginning?"

Des decided to take Chris to meet her family, who apparently drove their trailer all the way from Texas to Antigua.

Even better, ABC managed to arrange a furlough for Desiree's brother to help their ratings after he infamously challenged Sean Lowe's integrity when Des appeared on The Bachelor.

Desiree's brother actually asked a meaningful question when he brought up how Chris felt about Des possibly forming stronger bonds with other guys than with him.

And with that being the question that America was asking, Chris pretty much gave the perfect answer, not yet even realizing the full story between Des and Brooks.

"If you find a girl that you're interested in, wherever, in your home town, you pursue her, you ask her on a date, but the same time, there are other people possibly doing the same thing."

Desiree's father accepted Chris request to propose. However, Des still wasn't sure if she'd even accept.

After picking out a ring, Chris met with Des and dropped down to one knee to propose...Only to have her tell him to stop.

And with Chris dropping a deuce thinking that he was about to get turned down on national TV, Des nervously explained the Brooks situation to him.

Des then told Chris that she had already sent Drew home earlier in the week before he even met her parents, making him the last man standing.

Des then told Chris, "Brooks kept me from seeing what was right in front of me...I love you."

That put Chris on the spot, having to decide whether or not he wanted to go through with his proposal knowing that Des had stronger feelings for Brooks just a few days earlier.

And fortunately, for all of the women in America, Chris did well...

"Do you want to grow old together? Do you want to share your experiences with me? Can I share mine with you? Do you want to start a family? Do you want to have kids? Desiree Eileen Hartsock, will you marry me?

During the After the Final Rose, Des filled Brooks in about Chris, as he hadn't yet had a chance to see what happened. "So after you left, yeah, it was actually really good."

Brooks took things in stride though and stayed classy. "I'm not entirely surprised...I saw the way that Des looked at Chris in Group Dates, in Rose Ceremonies. It was very apparent."

Des not only confirmed that her relationship with Chris was going strong, but that she was moving to Seattle next weekend.

To finish things off, Chris announced that he had a gift for Des, a framed poem about her with petals from each rose that he had received from her this season that he titled, "My Girl"

Finally, it was announced that the next Bachelor is going to be Juan Pablo, who's season is going to set record ratings for ABC.

Not that I condone soccer players, but at least this guy has some charisma, and ladies do love them the idea of a Latin lover.

Showing that he was a good sport, Juan Pablo said, "That was a great ending today. Wow...I don't know how I'm gonna beat that. I hope I can beat it."

See ya next season!

The Big Brother 15 Blog - "Last year on my birthday, I was at my house watching live feeds all day. This year on my birthday, I'm in the feeds getting spanked at the Big Brother house"

Click here to get the most up to date Big Brother 15 Blog posts

This week began with everyone in the Big Brother house continuing to eat non stop and getting exponentially fatter, especially GinaMarie.

I don't know who GinaMarie Zimmerman used to model for, but Kirstie Alley probably needs to be frightened for her job.

Amanda tried to influence Judd's nominations as HOH. “I have to remind him that he always has to come home to where his bread is buttered, which is right here."

However, Judd was none too pleased. “Amanda’s getting on my nerves right now...If you want one, win one for yourself. She might control McCrae, but she don’t control the J-U-Double D."

I'm not sure if Judd Doughety was referring to his title as HOH or the Tennessee blanket that Amanda and McCrae defiled when he said, "If you want one, win one for yourself."

Upon getting to see Judd's HOH Room, the cast found pictures of Judd from when he was in high school and voted "biggest party animal."

That caused Jessie, who Judd clearly has a crush on, to say, “High school Judd is so adorable. Maybe I wouldn’t have let him take me to Prom, but I definitely would have let him do my homework for me.”

I had been thinking that Judd wears his plaid button down shirt to be fashionable, but it turns out he's just from Tennessee.

With Connie Chung announcing a surprise twist that would affect this week's MVP, Judd struggled with his nominations.

Howard tried to calm his nerves. “Don’t over think it…You’re not a Have-Not, Your HOH, and you get to sleep Jessie, I don’t see a downside to it.”

Maybe Judd will be able to figure out what that God awful tattoo is on Jessie Kowalski's side.

 Howard and Candice finally decided to hook up, or at least they admitted that they like each other.

“We just have a lot in common. We both from the South, we’re both Christian, and both of us were affected by a lot of the racial things that were happening in the house.”

Sadly, thanks to people like Aaryn Gries and GinaMarie Zimmerman, this season of Big Brother has more closely resembled the deep south in the 1950's than George Orwell's totalitarian vision from "1984."

The self absorbed Aaryn complained about Judd winning HOH, even though she wasn't even one of his targets since she's such an awful person that she isn't any threat to win.

“Judd thinks it’s a terrible time for him to be HOH, well, me too…I’m really hoping that Judd doesn’t do something stupid this week.”

Aaryn went on to complain to Kaitlin and Gina Marie, “You guys, being on the block is so stressful. I don’t want to go through it again.“

And when Kaitlin and GinaMarie tried to calm her down by reminding her that she hadn't even been nominated, Aaryn lost her shit.

“Don’t fucking talk to me like that GinaMarie!”

And when GinaMarie said, “Check your little head Aaryn,” Aaryn snapped back by saying, “Don’t tell me to check myself…I just don’t like the way you talk to me. It’s disrespectful, I don’t deserve it."

Of course, Aaryn Gries is the same girl who has made numerous racist and homophobic slurs while on camera, so maybe she's not in the best position to throw a pageant queen temper tantrum just because somebody didn't talk to her as respectfully as she may have liked.

The Have/Have Not Competition involved teams competing to eat the most frozen yogurt out of soft serve machines.

However, the flavors were nasty unholy unions like anchovy/habanero, chocolate/vanilla and Aaryn/GinaMarie.

That much was evidenced by Howard's first impression. "It’s burning my mouth, but it’s cold. I’m confused. This is not a dessert at all, it's a disaster." 
And while McCrae puked at the end, not all was bad for everyone.

On Big Brother After Dark Candice gushed, “The highlight of my day was seeing Howie eat it like a vagina. I really enjoyed watching that.”

She also said, "I just like seeing him with his shirt off, so that’s awesome, which caused a jealous McCarae to ask Amanda, "How come you don’t ever complement me with my shirt off?"

Then again, McCrae Olson isn't exactly the man of steel.

With Amanda trying to persuade him to nominate Howard for eviction Judd said, “If I do end up putting Howard up, then I have Candice, Spencer and Howard all against me."

Unfortunately Judd didn't exactly understand the concept of voting out the target of his nominations, as Amanda had to remind him, “No, Howard will be gone."

Ultimately, Judd decided not to rock the boat by making a big move, and nominated Aaryn and Kaitlin for eviction as the two easiest targets.

Aaryn, She didn't understand why she was still targeted as trouble maker, thinking that hurtful racist comments would just go away just like the semi-naked pictures of her on the Internet did.

Wait, that's not how it works?

“I feel like everything coming out of (GinaMarie's) mouth is mean. I don’t feel like I’ve been negative for a few weeks now.”

Aaryn continued to live in her own little narcissistic world of going to pageants and waking up next to strange dudes with empty cans of Aqua Net strewn throughout her hotel room.

“A lot of things said about me, or that I say catch on,” causing Amanda to deadpan, “That’s giving yourself a lot of credit.”

Howard and Spencer wanted to keep the moving company going, and made a new alliance with Judd, Kaitlin and GinaMarie that they called “The Outsiders”

Of course, Judd immediately told Helen and Andy about what he considered to be a "fake alliance," dooming The Outsiders from their inception.

Helen guessed that America was this week’s MVP, who curiously nominated Elissa after having voted for her to be the MVP for two consecutive weeks.

In the "girls who shouldn't think" category, Kaitlin was convinced that Elissa won America's MVP, but secretly nominated herself as some sort of strategy.

On the other hand, Elissa was convinced she was "betrayed" and snapped “Please stop” and "You put me up" at GinaMarie when she tried to hug her to console her.

Elissa continued on with her pity party. “I really just wanna go home, like honestly. You guys just vote me out, seriously…This is just not fun. I’m up every week."

Candice tried to get Elissa to regain her focus by asking, “What would your sister say to do," apparently not realizing that threatening to quit is exactly what Rachel Reilly would threaten to do whenever the game didn't go her way."

The Veto Competition required the contestants to did around in a pit of mud to find cards with varying numbers of points on them and accumulate the most points.

Kaitlin described the mud as being "so chunky, smells disgusting, and it is in so many places you don’t want it to be in,” meaning that her showmance with Jeremy left her perfectly prepared for the challenge

Aaryn. “This mud smells like manure, and the last think I want on my face is manure. If my face was covered, I would be useless,” which  I guess is just a matter of opinion.

Actually, I'm guessing that the only time Aaryn is useful is WHEN her face is covered.

Pizza delivery boy McCrae got the tip of his life when he found a card giving him $5,000 instead of points. “With $5,000, I could probably buy 25,000 pizzas, and that makes McCrae very happy.”

In order to redeem cards that had the highest total number of points Helen accepted a punishment of an 8 p.m. curfew for two nights.

Meanwhile, Judd was sent to solitary confinement in a room where a snooze alarm went off every 9 minutes, and Elissa agreed not to compete next week's Veto Competition.

Elissa, ended up with the highest point total, winning the Veto and making Helen and Judd's punishments for naught.

With Elissa finally feeling comfortable since she knew she would no longer be on the block, she went back to being a bitch.

And when Amanda tried to dress up and give McCrae a lap sexy lap dance for his birthday, for some reason Elissa thought that was the appropriate time to question her choice in attire, forgetting that Amanda is, well to put it nicely, fat.

"You brought a one piece? Who are you?”

And when Amanda told her that she got it Goodwill, Elissa dug a little deeper.

“Obviously, because, like, no one else would wear a one-piece bathing suit, ever…It looks like you’re working at a strip club.”

Thinking that America might not be clear on where she stood on one-piece swimsuits, Elissa kept going.

“I thought Amanda’s dominatrix outfit was ridiculous. I can’t believe she put that on. I don’t know if it embarrassed McCrae, but it embarrassed me. If I was doing something something hot for my husband, it wouldn’t be a one piece bathing suit.

And when Amanda finally tried to get everyone to leave the HOH room so she could get down to business, which consisted of eating "Happy Birthday" in icing off of McCrae's thigh, Elissa pushed the envelope even further.

"If I see that, I’m going to vomit. I'm not trying to be mean…But it is pretty gross."

That pushed Amanda to tears. “Elissa is malicious and mean, and plays it off like she’s this good Christian girl, but she’s just nasty.”

Elissa used the Veto on herself, and GinaMarie was added by America as her replacement nominee, putting all three of the "Mean Girls" on the block.

Wanting to win Elissa’s trust, Aaryn volunteered to throw HOH or give Elissa and Helen the power to make her nominations in the event that she won. 

However, Elissa had her own agenda. “I just don’t support mean girls. Aaryn is trouble, so she needs to go home.”

Of course, Elissa and her sister Rachel Reilly are two of the biggest "mean girls around," but I guess Elissa was just pissed when she found out that she wasn't the prettiest "mean girl" on the show. 

So when Helen told Elissa not to tell anyone about The Outsider alliance, she went straight to Kaitlin and asked, “Did you make a deal with Spencer and Howard?"

Of course, Aaryn overheard Elissa's conversation with Kaitlin and went straight back to Helen.

Not knowing that she had been busted, Elissa emphatically denied tipping Kaitlin off.

“Aaryn doesn’t know what I said, I didn’t even say that to Kaitlin…I want to know why you were talking to Helen about something I said to Kaitlin?"

With Kaitlin trying to play both sides, she was ultimately voted out 9-0, saying good bye only to GinaMarie as she stormed off.

At her exit interview, Connie Chung asked Kaitlin what she thought about being referred to in social media as "The Mean Girls," along with Aaryn and GinaMarie.

"That kind of hurts, I’m from Minnesota (because that automatically makes her nice?)…But I will admit, I aligned with some catty girls, some seriously catty girls.”

When asked if she had any regrets about the mattress flipping incident, which turned out to be a racial incident, Kaitlin replied, “A little bit, I definitely picked the wrong side of the house, but what can you do,” showing that her only concern was that she didn't make it any further in the game. 

Finally, when asked about her showmance with Jeremy, Kaitlin replied, “I’m going to Vegas…He can do what he wants," proving that showing your tits to old men for tips at nightclubs runs just a little bit deeper than reality show romances. 

The POV Competition was game of roulette, with the contestants dropping a ball into a spinning wheel to try and record the highest score.

And while Aaryn won, she pledged her power of nomination to Helen, although Elissa clearly gave her an out by secretly lobbying against her with Kaitlin. 

And to prove that she's really taking a hard line on the racist and homophobic comments that have been issued in the house this year, Julie Chan brought back Big Brother's favorite homophobe, Jeff Shroeder, for an interview that included no talk whatsoever about Aaryn and GinaMarie's prejudicial comments.

Keep up the good journalism Julie.

Big Brother 15 Power Ratings - Each week I'm going rank the Big Brother contestants based upon their power and vulnerability within the house. Here's how the contestants break down after the third week:

12. Aaryn Gries - On Big Brother After Dark it was revealed that Aaryn also made finals for MTV's The Real World, but picked Big Brother instead. Of course, The Real World might been a better choice, as their cast members can make racist comments, fight and still be invited back to appear on their Real World - Road Rules Challenge show.

Apparently there was some confusion when Aaryn was asked, "Do you want me to nut all of them?"

11. GinaMarie Zimmerman - With quotes like, “I do not like pickles at all, they disguise me, I mean despise me" (I think she was going for 'disgust me'), and “If I want to compromise somebody, I have to have a situation worth compronization," GinaMarie has been ripped for her linguistic skills.

Andy was up first. “I have never heard anybody butcher the English language quite like GinaMarie does, and as a teacher, part of it send shivers down my spine,” while Candice said, “With GinaMarie, I am a speech therapist, but I‘m definitely not a miracle worker.”

GinaMarie Zimmerman's fat: Just look at what Nick Uhas missed out on.

10. Rachel Reilly's Sister - Elissa's bitch attitude is starting to make her more and more of a target, especially since she no longer seems to be a threat to win America's MVP each week. Perhaps she should just lay low

9. Howard Overby - Howard Overby disrobed on the Big Brother After Dark live feed and while showing Spencer his penis...but I'm not going to go there.

8. Spencer Clawson - Spencer has tried hard to make some moves to shake up the game, but he keeps winding up on the wrong side of the fence. 

7. Jessie Kowalski - Is it just me, but now that Kaitlin is gone is Jessie starting to assume her place with Aaryn and GinaMarie in the "Mean Girls," kind of like when one of the girls would die in the movie Heathers?

6.  Candice Stewart - Did you know that Candice has a really big heart? Because if you didn't, she'll tell you every chance she gets on Big Brother After Dark.

5. Judd Daughtery - On the other hand, Judd seemed right at home. “I'm no stranger to mud. I like to go frog giggin'. Whenever you go, you get at the edge of the pond, you spear the frog, and you cut it’s legs off for dinner.”

4. Andy Herren - On Big Brother After Dark Andy joked, “I went into college a testiclology major but it was too hard." Actually, he wasn't joking...I don't think it was very hard for him at all.

3. Amanda Zuckerman - While Amanda has been controlling McCrae's game, she has a little bigger target on her chest than McCrae does.

Okay, make that two targets. At least we finally learned what Amanda Zuckerman was doing with all those Band-Aids she's been hording. She's been using them as pasties to cover up the bulls eyes on her fake boobs...She's calling them "Amand-Aids."

2. McCrae Olson - Talk about living the dream, here's what McCrae said in response to his birthday lap dance from Amanda.

"Last year on my birthday, I was at my house watching live feeds all day. This year on my birthday, I'm in the feeds getting spanked at the Big Brother house. This is awesome…Thanks guys, that was the best birthday gift ever.”

1. Helen Kim - Helen remains in control of the game, although sooner or later somebody is going to realize that they need to make a big move by either taking Helen out or splitting up Amanda and McCrae.